Bipolar Athlete: Maybe Your Kids are an Attempt to Fill a Triathlon Void

Since I have gotten more involved with triathlon, my friends who are not active in the sport have expressed bits of feedback and advise. Things like:

It will be good when you finish training for this race, because then you can return back to normal and maybe meet someone.
I think you need to look at what it is your are avoiding by training this hard.
That's great you got to ride your bike today, I had to clean the bathrooms in the house and go grocery shopping.
Wow! Nine hours of sleep! <<insert baby name here>> had me up again all night.
You have liked a lot of things like this before (implying this too shall pass).
Well, aren't you lucky?

So, am I lucky? Absolutely. But at the same time my happiness is not random. It is also the result of choices I made about my life and yes, I am going to step up and take some credit. And if my life doesn't look like what others might think a successful happy, 38 year old woman's life "should" look like -- well, that isn't really my problem now, is it?

One of the most important things training at this level has taught me is that athletes have to take care of themselves. This can involve eating good food, working with a physical therapist, prioritizing sleep, weekends full of long bike rides and trail runs (did my first 60 mile weekend this weekend btw - 50 mile ride, 10 mile run; that's the map from my bike ride).

To some, this might appear selfish because it doesn't involve sacrifice or family or work or children. Letting go and ignoring this judgement is one of the hardest challenges of everything I am doing right now. My brain's default is the exact opposite - to beat myself up, to withhold happiness and self-care. Am I filling a void with all this training? Who knows? Who cares!?! Right now I am happy, training is going well, I am meeting all sorts of wonderful people who share my interests and my brain is more stable than it ever has been.