This is my first Valentine's Day as an adult being alone. Literally, since I was 22 I have always had someone special on this day.
It was one of those secret success marks I used to place on myself. It was okay for other people to be alone on Valentine's Day, because it is a bs holiday any invented by marketers to make money anyway. But not for me. For me, if I didn't have someone to share it with, I was a failure.
I guess I let that go. I am not sure how, but I did. Because I sure don't feel like a failure today. I feel great. How? Why? What did I do? I am honestly not sure, but looking back here are a few things that are different in my life over the past six months or so:
- Prioritized training above other activities (especially watching TV)
- Spending time with teammates; going to that team workout even when working out alone would be easier
- Eating good food even when it means spending a bit more - especially yummy green veggies!
- Limiting my hours at work - sure, I could complete more work, but no one ever dies wishing they had worked more, right?
- Spending time with my dog - and deciding it is okay, and not crazy, to love her as a member of my family
- Being honest with myself and my doctor and my therapist about how I am doing
- Not feeling guilty about medication - plenty of people take medications for plenty of other medical conditions, so taking mine is not a sign of weakness
- Allowing myself time to do nothing - being patient and admitting that some problems cannot be solved but just need to be waiting through (and not beating myself up for ending that sentence in a preposition!)
- Noticing when I have experienced a traumatic experience of any kind and giving myself the treatment, rest and love I need to heel and recover
It isn't a formal recipe for success and it isn't rocket science, but it seems to be working.
In training land, I am running a relay this weekend. Was supposed to be my first full marathon, but the foot injury sidelined me for a bit. Should be a great time. It is a small race, about 450 people, and about 100 are from my team! It is nice to feel excited instead of terrified by that.
Oh -- and here is my half ironman training board. I keep tallies on it for fun since I started training. Will post it from time to time to see progress.
Labels: happiness, injury, plan, training, wipe board
